Shit Happens.

Sekadar untuk senyuman. Ceria-ceriakan hari anda!

Have YOU ever wondered just WHY shit happens to you?  Well, you're not alone. People have wondered about this fundamental question for many ages, and everyone seems to have a different theory. So, for your reading enjoyment, we have here a massive collection of various ways in which people have tried to explain why shit happens:

Taoism:
Shit happens.
If you can shit, it isn't shit.
Shit happens, so flow with it.

Hare Krishna:
Shit Happens, Rama Rama Ding Ding.
She-it happens, She-it happens, happens, happens, she-it, she-it... (Repeat until you become one with she-it)
Please accept this flower and buy our shit.

Confucianism:
Confucious say, "Shit happens."
Confucious says, "If shit has to happen, let it happen properly."

Buddhism:
If shit happens, it isn't really shit.
If shit happens, it isn't really happening to anyone.
Shit will happen again to you next time.
Only he who totally gives up the desire for shit will have salvation.

Zen:
First, shit was shit. Then it wasn't. Now I'm one with Zen, and shit is shit again.

Hinduism:
I've seen this shit happening before.
This shit is not a religion, it is the way of life.
This shit happening is you.

Catholicism:
If shit happens, you deserved it.
You were born shit, you are shit, and you will die shit. (unless you accept Jesus as your savior)

Charismatic Catholicism:
Shit is happening because you deserve it, but we love you anyway.

Judaism:
Why does shit always happen just before closing the deal?

Islam:
We don't take any shit.
If shit happens, it is the will of Allah.
If shit happens, blame the Jews and America.
If shit happens, blow yourself up.

Jehovah's Witnesses:
Knock Knock, "Shit Happens."
Here, we insist you take our shit.
Shit happens door to door.
Open the door and I'll show you what shit is.
Good Morning, I have some shit for you to read.
Want to buy a subscription to our Shit?

Darwinism:
Survival of the shittiest.
This shit was once food.

Creationism:
... And the Lord said "Let there be shit" ... and there came piles of it.
After six days of this shit, He rested.

Atheism:
I don't believe this shit!
Shit doesn't happen. Shit is dead.
It looks and smells like shit, so I'm damned if I'm going to taste it.
That shit is bullshit.

Agnosticism:
It looks and smells like shit, but I haven't tasted it, so I'm not sure whether its shit or not.
I don't know shit!
How can we know if shit happens?
You can't prove any of this shit!

Native Americans:
Shit is sacred when it happens.

Shintoism:
You inherit the shit of your ancestors.
Shit is everywhere. So as long as you're stepping in it, show it some respect.
Everything except Japan is Shit.

Satanism:
We hope bad shit happens to all of you.
We will make your shit happen.
Shit doesn't just happen... it's created by an asshole.
What's wrong with shit happening?
Shit rules!

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